I was on the couch with the love of my life chatting away when I noticed I was feeling EXTREMLY weird, so weird I could barely explain what I was feeling, I feeling so confused!!
Eben (My boyfriend) spoke to me and when he finished his sentence up it had felt like what he said had been said hours ago, way in the past and as if I was just having a flash back of it. I started feeling an emotional effect on me, but I didn’t know what that was, I felt emotional but then I didn’t, then I really did.
I had the weirdest thought in my head repeating itself which, and I don’t really think like this. ‘I don’t want to die, I don’t want to die!’ kept rolling in my head. Out of the blue, so very unexpectedly I burst into tears, but not any type of cry or tears, these were big tears!! As if I had been suffering the loss of someone, as Eben held me tightly those tears still streamed down my face and the thoughts still kept going on and on like a stuck record player.
I had a random thought, ‘let me check my sugar!’. So I asked my Eben to get my glucose monitor, I tried testing my sugar and still feeling as if I were leaving this earth, felt like I wanted to go into a deep sleep and not wake up any time soon and then the numbers popped up on the screen and I couldn’t see and just heard the worry and scare in his voice telling me to look at the screen of the glucose monitor, it was 1.7, as someone of you who don’t know about type 1 diabetes that is a number saying you could possibly be lying on your death bed.
How I was feeling magnified ten times worse!! I was sweating and didn’t realize it, the clock was ticking and I didn’t know what was going on! My mind wasn’t here anymore it had disappeared somewhere, I didn’t know what my body was doing either.
I told Eben to call my aunt (I live with her), and she came rushing, and could barely see her face or what she was doing. She shoved some syrup down my throat. We checked my sugar again it was exactly the same..1.7. Eben picked me up and rushed to the car with me, on the way to hospital it was. Eben stayed to pack a bag just in case because it was very unusual for this to happen.
My aunt speeding as fast as she could to get me to hospital, going through red robots, pushing in front of cars, knowing we had to get there fast else there wouldn’t be no waking up tomorrow morning…
We got to the hospital and they tested my sugar and it had dropped even more! It had dropped to 1.5. The doctor put a glucose drip on me right away.
As it slowly went up I started coming back, I knew where I was, I wasn’t as confused. I was very shocked, I never want to feel how I felt like that night. It was scary..
Life really is like a ticking clock, sometimes it ticks faster than normal and you never know when those moments are going to come, or when the clock is going to stop.